Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Queen of Procrastination.

Indeed I am! There has been so many things I've been meaning to do the past couple of weeks that I still have not & honestly I don't have a valid excuse for any of it. I seriously think I have a problem. :S

Well the past couple of weeks I have had next to nothing shift-wise so pretty much most of my time has been free & what did I do?! Spend hours sleeping, watching tv or on the computer which included minimum productivity. Gah! I continuously get angry with myself but still do little about it. Is it 'cause deep down inside I really DON'T want to do these things? Possibly.. Maybe.. Probably.. Grr..

Well don't want to go into any more detail 'cause yeah, i'm a lazy ass but here's a list of the more 'important' stuff I should be doing.
  • FINALLY calling the driving instructor & setting up some lessons. Man i've put this off for waaayyy too long. ><"
  • Picking up some of my past artworks from school. Need some of them for my portfolio, which brings me to my next point..
  • Working more on my portfolio! Probably the most important thing on my list. Mid-year apps open on the 27th April. C'mon that's like pretty much a month away?! & I've only got one official piece to put in my portfolio so far. Ahh!
  • Working on my commissioned artwork. Lol. Yeah a friend of mine actually thought I was worthy of creating an artwork for her. She full bought me canvases & paint to create her a masterpiece. Flattered I am indeed but yeah I told her it'll be a while.. Which was the truth. Hahh.
  • Cleaning up more around the house! I'm THAT lazy. :S
  • Accepting more shifts. Seriously i've been called in quite an amount of times to fill in but i've declined most. Usually I am actually out & cant come in but there have been times where I really just didn't feel like working & said I had something on that night, when I didn't. Eg: Today. HAHH!
  • In reference to the above point, saving up! After my epic saving era before my holiday, I got lazy to save. Lol. Well actaully after spending all that money on my holiday, I realised the true joy of spending. I'm so lame. Well i'm starting again now & with the minimum shifts i'm getting, it's kind of hard to with all the weekly expenses to go with.

Uhh.. I think that's all for now. Wow. So bad.. Well if I don't do any of this soon, I'll probably blog about it if I did, someone please! Give me another wake up call & slap me in the face or something?! Haha. No, seriously. I really need to change. LOL @ change. Whatever.

- Jess. x

Saturday, March 21, 2009


Finally submitted a 'deviation' on my DeviantArt account after sooooo long. Just looked back & my last post was like May of last year?! Oh my goodness.. Well did lose my 'creative passion' for a while but I guess the thought & will for me to actually start design school soon urged me to fuel that 'passion' again & work on my skills. Hahh! Sounds so 'inspirational-speech-cliche'. Oh my i'm using alot of '...' Ah well.. Anyways I'm quite happy with this piece & I haven't been happy with any of my work lately so it's a relief to all those who were concerned. Pffttt..

Ok may as well tell you about it while i'm here. This piece is titled Renaissance, not referring to the periodic era but to the true definition of the word. The word renaissance simply means rebirth, resurgence, reawakening! Whilst taking these photos I felt so at peace with myself.. That everything was okay. I found the world beautiful again. Lol. I'm so emo.. Ok sorry to kill the moment.. but yeah I just wanted to stand there & watch & possibly never leave.

My holiday up the coast & interstate really opened my eyes to new surroundings, new opportunities, growing up & coming to the realisation for the need to be more independent. Yeah just to fill in gaps, I went on holidays for the first time without my parents & yeah realized how much I relied on them. Hahh. Yes back to my independence speech.. I just recently turned 18 & i've yet to run a muck. I can admit I am most of the time, in many's eyes, a good kid. I don't take much shame in it, as it is indeed a good thing. Hahh. But yeah I realized I need to rely less on people & try to find stuff out on my own. Yay!

Anyways back to my piece.. Well that pretty much explains the representation of it & why it's so relevant to my life right now. It may look like just some pretty photos taken of the famed Kirra Beach by some wannabe photographer to most but it means so much more to me. It captured the pureness of what I was feeling at the time. It captured MY reawakening. :)

As I remember I actually didn't take these photos with the intent of being 'artistic' as I was just being touristy & taking as many photos as I could to keep as memories.. but when I looked back on them I was instantly reminded of what I felt standing there. It inspired me to be creative again.. I'm actually considering adding it to my portfolio for when I apply for college. Thoughts?

Thanks for listening kids. :)
- Jess. x


Ok so yeah watched Confessions of a Shopaholic today with the sister, her friend & her friend's sister. Was pretty funny. Not all stupid. Yeah i'm being very minimal adjective wise today. Hahh. Isla Fisher is so adorable! I wanna be her bestfriend & her dance moves are just killer! Lol. You have ot see for yourself. :) All in all, entertaining & i'd say yeah, go watch it. Hooray for my lame review! Now go! Watch! NAAAOOO! :P

Tuesday, March 17, 2009


How I get the urge to write some super awesome blog about my thoughts about my experiences the past couple of days & amaze you with my literary glory (SIF!) then go get something from my room or get sidetracked for just one tiny tad of a second & poof! The inspiration is gone! *Sigh. Ooh phone call. Brb. :)

Thursday, March 12, 2009

♫ As we go on.. We remember.. All the times we've had together..

Yes, token graduation-we'll-be-friends-forever song. C'mon, this song has possibly been played at every graduation, farewell dinner or whatever since it came out. It was played at my Year 6 Farewell for goodness sake, along with my Year 10 formal, my Year 12 graduation AND formal. Haha. Ok to my point.. I know it's a real 'emotional' song & usually ends up with a couple of people in tears or people laughing at how lame it is, me being one of them. Lol. But thinking back this song really does have some kind of significance..

After graduation, of course you expect the changing of paths. You see people moving away, getting new jobs, new friends, new relationship & new lives. Me being a half-empty type at times i readied myself for these changes to avoid disappointment but i also felt like such a bad person for expecting the worse.

Now that most of my friends have started uni / tafe it has been extra hard to keep in contact with. It's either they have school this day & are free the next but then i have work or whatever that day.. or something like money shortage gets in the way. I see them every few weeks or so, even my best of friends & when we talk on the phone / msn / other social network, we're always like 'I miss you' & 'We have to hang soon'.. It saddens me. I sometimes have these short anger spurts at them or myself for having these schedules that also makes me feel so selfish after. I need to change!

I know that in some of these cases it has been my fault since school is school & cant be changed where i can take certain days of work since i'm only part time. I hate saying no to friends to go out just 'cause i have a shift i just accepted or i'm low on cash. I am now going to make more of an effort to see my mates to stop my anti-social insanity. Haha. Because honestly, I sincerely do miss all those times we've spent together.. I think about it alot.

I effing miss these girls so much! They were the reason i even went to school. :)

I miss my random hangouts with those girls that made everything better!

I miss when we were young & carefree!

I miss being able to tell absolutely everything to certain people.

I miss our attempts at the impossible. Well clearly impossible to us. Hahh!

I miss being absolutely loved. :)

I miss those crazy days.

I miss people being themselves. :P

I miss always having someone to lean on, in this case literally on Leesh. :P

I miss those kids i visited just 'cause i really liked hanging out with them. :)

I miss how we all came back together in the end & hung out just like the old days.. even with all the crap that happened before. :)

I miss our hardcore party season (LULZ!) *cough* & how we all let lose. :)

I just miss it all..


Saturday, March 7, 2009

I've lost track..

There was sooooo much i wanted to write about in this blog but kept putting it off & now i've lost track of most of those things. Hahh. I wont say i'm gonna 'try' & write regularly anymore 'cause i'll just disappoint some, including myself.. ><" So i'll just say, please, follow & check every once in a while 'cause you'll never know when i'll have some sponatenous urge to write of the tales of my life.. or just rant for the sake of it.. Like now. I'm actually (semi) ranting about my lack of commitment to my blog. Haha. Sounds serious. Not really but hey. I suck at keeping to things so just take whatever's given because it indeed will be given rare.